Not everyone online is always kind and friendly. People can say and do things which might upset or worry you – but you should never have to feel that way. It’s important to know what to do if someone is being mean online.
What is online bullying?
Online bullying or cyberbullying is bullying behaviour that takes place online or using technology.
An argument between two friends is not cyberbullying, but repeated name-calling, exclusion or other unkind messages could be.
Bullying in any form, online or offline, is never okay.
Let’s look at some examples
Firstly, we’re really sorry this is happening! It sounds like you may be being targeted by a bully. The most important thing to do in this situation is tell an adult you trust – this could be a parent or whoever looks after you at home, or a teacher at school.
We would suggest saving the messages, for example by taking a screenshot. Then you can use this as evidence to share with an adult you trust. Explain what’s been happening. You could start by saying something like:
“I’ve received these messages and they’re upsetting me. Please can you help.”
You may be able to block the messages from coming through in future – but an adult will be able to help support you and investigate where the messages are coming from.
This can be tough – we’re sorry you’re feeling left out. Are you sure your friends are deliberately excluding you? If you feel comfortable doing so, it may be worth telling them how you’re feeling.
Sometimes people can forget that their actions online can still really hurt people’s feelings, so make sure they know you want to join the group and ask if there’s a reason that you can’t.
If this doesn’t help, then it’s really important to talk to an adult at home or at school about what’s going on.
Remember – if your friends are deliberately leaving you out, then they are not being very good friends to you. See if you can find a different friend or family member to chat with instead.
Oh no! It’s important to ask permission before sharing photos online and it sounds like your friend might have forgotten this.
Firstly, have you spoken to them? It’s possible they thought you wouldn’t mind so letting them know how you’re feeling is important. You could try saying:
“Hey, I don’t really like that photo you posted of me. Please would you take it down?”
A good friend should respect your wishes and take it down when you ask, but if they refuse then you may need to try something else.
If it’s been posted on social media then you might be able to report the photo as having been shared without your permission and get it taken down this way.
But most importantly, always tell an adult you trust about what’s going on. You could say something like:
“I’m having some trouble with a friend online and need some help.”
This kind of behaviour, where another player on a game seems to enjoy disrupting gameplay, is called griefing or trolling. It can be very frustrating and difficult to cope with.
Firstly, try to remember that griefers are normally looking to get a reaction – so don’t let them win by retaliating or losing your temper in the messages. Instead stay calm and note down their username. This can be used to block them or report them via the game’s reporting systems.
For more information about reporting click here.
Top Tips
- It’s really important you tell someone about what is going on and it will make you feel better too. An adult at home or at school can help you figure out what to do next.
- Try the report and block buttons. These can be found in most games and on social media and it’s a good idea to see if you can spot them. For more information visit our page on what does the report button do?
- You may want to delete a mean message as soon as you read it but remember it’s helpful to take a screenshot or save it as evidence you can take to an adult.
- Don’t retaliate or respond unkindly. This can make things worse or sometimes even lead to you getting in trouble. Try and stay calm and get support from an adult you trust instead.
- We’re often told that the best way to stop bullies is to ignore them, but remember you should always speak to someone about what’s been going on so that you can get support and advice.
